On The Silly Side by Jimmy Del Ponte
(The opinions and views expressed in the commentaries of The Somerville News belong solely to the authors of those commentaries and do not reflect the views or opinions of The Somerville News, its staff or publishers.)
One of my new years resolutions was to set lower goals for myself - so far, so good - but it got me thinking: “what about my kids? I hope they don't set low goals for themselves.” Okay, so I sort of said what I said for comic content - plus my kids don't read this column. They wouldn't read it unless it was presented on “Your Space” or “My Tube” or whatever it is - in a very condensed version. Perhaps if it was scrolled beneath an episode of Spongebob they would take a quick glance at it.
As their father, I want their goals to be high, but not ridiculously un-reachable. I am not the type of parent that pushes my kids into stuff like sports or too many extra-curricular activities - try it, hate it and then move on. You wont hear me putting up an argument.
When I was a kid my Dad brought me to Little League try-outs at Trum field. - I went out in the field, someone hit the ball to me, I stuck my glove up and closed my eyes. The ball fell six feet from me and my Dad said: “okay, that's it, lets go home.” My Little League career never made it past that day. I signed my oldest kid up for soccer when he was six years old - he hated it and quit and I didn't put up too much of a fight because I hated it too. Too much standing around at Tufts field freezing while kids ran back and forth kicking a ball. Then both boys played little league baseball for a year - shoddy politics within that system forced us to quit that too (yes, I can find an excuse anywhere).
Happily, Somerville Little League is now running like a well-oiled machine thanks to Joe Janeiro, so we may throw our gloves back into the field (assuming I don't have to exert myself too much). Hey - I bought them new gloves and a bag of balls and we were out there practicing at the end of the summer, so I did make some effort. To be honest, if they decide not to go for it, that's fine with me - they have their music - or as I like to call it, “my retirement program.” When they become rich musicians they can stick me in a nice, upscale old age home in Florida.
You see, my parents may not have encouraged me in sports, but they were there for other stuff. My father was a Scout leader at St Clements Troop 71 and even came to camp with us for a whole week and my mom was a Cub Scout den mother. Mom also wrote a little musical that we performed for the Scout talent show - but she was never a soccer mom. She was however, a Project Star mom. Project Star was a very special federally funded summer theatre arts program that has a special place in many Somerville residents' hearts. She took me to see their 1967 production of West Side Story starring Larry Testa (formerly of Gorham Street). David (Larry's brother) and I loved it so much, we joined up the next year - that show paved the way for my love of the theater - something I have passed on to my kids. I also remember mom playing music in the house and singing all the time. We listened to Tubby The Tuba and mom sang songs from My Fair Lady. She didn't take me to hockey, but she did take me to church.
Dad drove me to my guitar teacher every week and even took lessons with me for a while. He bought himself a guitar from some guy he was having a cocktail with at The Cadillac or The Coronet - either that or it fell off a truck - he took me to music lessons but not to karate or basketball. I was encouraged to learn pop music instead of Pop Warner - but it all worked out.
Today, I have tons of parent friends who spend just about every waking hour shuffling their kids to ballet, to Scouts, to basketball, to cheerleading, etc. - God bless them. I'm always chauffeuring my kids someplace. My boys have been in Children's Theatre productions and have even performed with their friends in a rock band at Redbones. Joe McCain and me were the roadies and moved all our boys' equipment - so it's not a matter of bring a lazy dad, because the kids do plenty. I am always toting a bunch of kids someplace or another - I'll sign the kids up for whatever they want to try and support them the best I can, but if/when they decide to quit, that will be fine with me. - you won't hear me saying: “You started it and you're going to finish it!” - instead, I would say: “Okay, that's it, lets go home.” That's one more episode of The King Of Queens I can watch.
You can email Jimmy with comments directly at jimmydel@rcn.com
Jimmy, you sound like a silly baby boomer. I'm very wealthy, 35, but I want my kids to learn how hard it is to be successful. My kids have to learn to finish what they start. Period. Without that, you end up with spoiled bums who give up anytime things get a little hard, which is what we see these days. Kids out of college who are not used to dealing with anything real. That's because their parents told them it was OK to do just the things they wanted. If you don't feel like it, poor little baby, then don't do it, that's their philosophy. It does not work that way in real life... Most of the time, you have to do what you don't like doing... It's real life.
Posted by: Elite Scum | January 13, 2008 at 11:31 AM
Dear Elite Scum...Wow... you're wealthy ... Look at you !!! and Humble too !! In case you didn't get it Mr Wealthy, the article is supposed to be mildly entertaining . And .Hey, dont worry about my kids. My son is playing Beethoven and Billy Joel right now on the piano so he's doing ok. The liitle one can bench press ...me ... and play the drum solo from The Beatles White Album. Worry about your own kids. You sound like a barrell of laughs !! Your kids probably love doing activities and sports and stuff just to get away from you. And your 35 !!! WOW !!! I have a pair of Beatle boots upstairs that are older than you, and probably smarter. And listen Skippy , don't tell me about real life.
I know all about it, you dope. I cant even believe I took the tme to respond to your foolish comments.
Posted by: Silly Jimmy | January 14, 2008 at 06:28 PM
Dear Mr. Cereal Bowl Haircut, I worry about your kids only because you told the entire world about them by posting your, oh so mildly entertaining, article! Before that I would have not cared less about them. I don't think I'm the only one now who would think that those poor kids need to be saved... From their silly father! What do you know about real life, Dopey? What did you have to do to make it in real life? I've had to bust my butt since I remember. My dad made me learn Chinese when I was little. Which I hated. But now I'm glad he did and that he did not let me give up like many other loser parents do!
Have a nice day.
Posted by: Elite Scum | January 14, 2008 at 08:45 PM
I think what Jimmy was attempting to say is that you should not push your kids to be in a certain sport or music class just because as a parent you envisioned your child as the star player on his high school football team. Take the time to listen to your childs interest is a good quality that not every parent has. Perhaps the author was reflecting on a particular situation he had seen in the past and this article is an underlining suggestion for parents that need a new resolution in their life as well.
I work on behalf of New York Kids Club in Manhattan and we offer a number of classes that range for physical activities like wall climbing and kickboxing to artsy activiites like ballet and musical appreciation. Is a great atmosphere for children to get an idea of what they like and don't like with nuturing teachers that are passionate about what they teach.
Posted by: katie | January 14, 2008 at 10:10 PM
So your WEALTHY BIG DEAL........ Its about the children not the money.......Then again maybe you wish you were WEALTHY.. With that statment..We are all WEALTHY if we have children it has to be up to them of what thay may like and not so support whatever it is.....Thay do best. GOD BLESS THE CHILDREN..
Posted by: Silly Me | January 15, 2008 at 12:56 AM
Dear Elite Scum-Bag . Send a picture of your self so we can give your haircut a name. You foolish man. And don't worry about my kids...they are fine. And by the way....we all have cereal bowl haircuts in my family, even Grandma !!!.And let me clear something up for you "35 and stupid" As soon as my kids drop one activity, they pick up another. WE spent 2 hours sledding on Monday, My 2 kids play piano , guitar , sax, bass, drums and a variety of pianos,and they have already performed in bands in clubs !!!! My son was a finalist in The Boston Theatre Marathon.HE filmed a pilot for BRAVO !! This reminds me of two little kids saying..NAY NAY ....!! But It's fun !!! It's what I'm about !! Worry about your own nerdy problems.Oh yes, one more thing.....IDIOT !!!
Posted by: Mr Cereal Bowl Haircut | January 15, 2008 at 05:53 AM
Anyone who says he's wealthy probably is not. That guy sounds like a weirdo. Hey, My father made me go to Greek school!! (but I'm not wealthy) Everyone raises their kids differently.
The comments on this page are very entertaining.They should publish the blog in the paper.
Posted by: Eddie O. | January 15, 2008 at 06:21 AM
Hey Eddie, did they ever fix that front door at the Greek school? Seems like they had that "enter in rear" sign up for years !! As for cereal bowl haircut, its nice to see your kids doing well, just keep in mind that my kid can beat up your student of the month. Welcome to Somerville yuppie (aka Barney)
Posted by: Fresh Bastard | January 15, 2008 at 08:14 AM
I will say one thing for sure... this line "...parent friends who spend just about every waking hour shuffling their kids to ballet, to Scouts, to basketball, to cheerleading, etc..." -- is so damned true and so much different than when I was a kid. My old man wouldn't give me a ride to a rock fight.
Though, whatever we can do as parents to make sure they get an education and stay off the Oxy/h/Coke/etc is what is really important. The funniest thing is that once they're gone -- off to college or the service -- you actually miss all that running around. Oh well... that's life.
Jimmy (cereal bowl), good for you doing all that with your kids and being proud. Though something has to be said for a little stick-to-it-ness.
Posted by: Imux | January 15, 2008 at 08:59 AM
"I'll sign the kids up for whatever they want to try and support them the best I can, but if/when they decide to quit, that will be fine with me. - you won't hear me saying: “You started it and you're going to finish it!” - instead, I would say: “Okay, that's it, lets go home.” That's one more episode of The King Of Queens I can watch."
I'll let my kids try any sport, activity or musical instrument they want. If they don't like it, then they can quit, but in sports, not till after the season. Once you sign up to play a team sport it is not fair that, one, you might have taken away another childs spot, two, your decision affects every other kid on that team who made a commitment to play until the end of the season. Three, you instill in your child
that once you make a commitment to a team sport that quitting is not an option, if you quit because the manager yells at you or if you missed a catch or free throw, how is that kid going to react when he/she is in the real world facing real bosses and co-workers? "Oh, I just don't like my job, so I'm going to quit so I can sit on the couch with Dad and watch "King of Queens with a bottle of Boones Apple Wine"!
Posted by: Responsibility | January 15, 2008 at 09:54 AM
Okay ...ENOUGH !!! Dont you morons know when someone is joking around??? Read the name of the stupid article. ON THE SILLY SIDE !!!! get a friggin life. IT WAS A JOKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why is it that everone who knows how to use a computer thinks they are a genius? The real world..Bosses and co-workers ?? Team Commitments ?? Lighten up !!! You are the reason I dont like youth sports... Know it all parents like you.
Posted by: Silly Jimmy | January 15, 2008 at 02:31 PM
Jim relax, apparently you have a senitive side. Are you sure you were raised in Somerville? Toughen up and grow a spine.
Posted by: Real Ville | January 15, 2008 at 03:24 PM
All of a sudden the article is a JOKE!!!!!!!! It may have started off that way but didn't end that way.
Too freakin bad! Silly Jimmy need a hug?
Posted by: Jimmy Boy | January 15, 2008 at 03:40 PM
"Why is it that everone who knows how to use a computer thinks they are a genius?"
Right back at you "Silly Jimmy"!
"You are the reason I dont like youth sports... Know it all parents like you."
No, the reason you don't like youth sports was because you sucked playing sports. Hmmmmmmmm, what was your favorite line.....I know......"do you guys want some quality H2O"!
Posted by: Jimmy Boy | January 15, 2008 at 03:47 PM
This is a humor column and a personal memoir. Some of you don't seem to be taking it in the spirit in which it was written.
Posted by: Ron Newman | January 15, 2008 at 03:59 PM
Cereal Bowl Boy, bull... You were not joking at all . You were trying to push this crap as a lesson in how all good parents should educate their kids. And now that people are not putting up with it you are putting your tail between your hairy legs. Loser. Quitter. Stand up for what you believe for once.
Jimmy Boy: kids who don't play sports are generally the smart ones. The ones like myself, who now are laughing at the ex-jocks who are drinking themselves to death in bars, thinking about the great high school times, when they were popular among other dumbos; before reality set in.
Posted by: Elite Scum | January 15, 2008 at 09:02 PM
Jimmy,
I have known you for many years. You are an awesome father, a great friend to many people, comedian, musician, radio personality, and quite an athlete in the day. I read your column and got it right away. I actually laughed my ass off. Why? Because I know you and I understand your humor in things. These people don’t know you.
I’ve always said words spoken are not misinterpreted but words written often are.
Don’t let these people get to you. They just don’t get the full effect reading it on a website than if you were speaking about it in person or on the radio. Nobody can read a tone of voice
Keep up the good work. You’re a funny bastard Jimmy. I look forward to reading your silly side since I don’t get to listen to you on the radio that much.
Cereal bowl haircut? Ha ha ha……. They got you on that one though!
Posted by: Patriot | January 15, 2008 at 09:25 PM
Jimmy - you sound like a caring and involved dad.
Elite Scum - Judging by your comments I'd bet there isn't anything elite about you. It sounds as though you have some unresolved issues; get some professional help.
Posted by: Kate | January 16, 2008 at 09:11 AM
Scummy,
Why don't you take your nerdy little ass up to Somerville High and ask the employees in the Headmasters office for a list of student athletes who received either full or partial scholarships to various colleges around this country for just the last ten years. After reading this list your pocket protector might explode!
It seems to me that you were a little pimpled puke wandering the halls in high school because you were such a nerd you didn't know how to strike up a conversation with anyone. Are you still reading the Nancy Drew mysteries by flashlight underneath you sheets at night?
Posted by: To Elite Scum | January 16, 2008 at 09:16 AM
"This is a humor column and a personal memoir. Some of you don't seem to be taking it in the spirit in which it was written."
That's where you are wrong again snapperhead. We are taking it exactly "in the spirit in which it was written in."
I lived in Somerville all of my life and never heard of this Jimmy Boy.......so he can't be very good at what he does. Maybe a small clique of his friends thinks he something because he was used as "filler" at some obscure radio station once or twice, but personally I couldn't care less if he wrote a column here or not.
Posted by: To Ron | January 16, 2008 at 09:23 AM
Jimmy, I have known you for an awful long time, probably longer that almost anyone else, YOU ARE a great Dad, a great person and a awesome friend. Keep doing what you are doing. Mike
Posted by: Mike Bonanno | January 16, 2008 at 10:01 AM
"It seems to me that you were a little pimpled puke wandering the halls in high school because you were such a nerd you didn't know how to strike up a conversation with anyone."
Sounds like that was your school life, Scum; what a shame you're still carrying around all that anger.
"personally I couldn't care less if he wrote a column here or not."
Obviously, his column has struck a nerve with you, To Ron aka Elite Scum.
Posted by: Kate | January 16, 2008 at 01:06 PM
Jimmy you are a great dad... My comments are for the wealthy dude who needs to brage. That he is weslthy..... That statment had nothing to do with your column......I HATE PEOPLE THAT BRAGE ABOUT WEALTH>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Posted by: Silly Me | January 16, 2008 at 01:12 PM
If I could decipher who you are trying to lambast, then your post would make some sense.
Posted by: Katie Kid | January 16, 2008 at 01:25 PM
Hey, dumbos, let me explain. I did not brag about being wealthy. I'm a very modest guy, in general. But I am proud of where I am, sorry if that makes you envious or something. I said it because I wanted to make the point that my kids don't have to worry about making a living later on. We already have all the money they will need to live without working all their life. Look, I make in a week what most of you make in one year. That without even counting the bonuses. Live with it. The point I was trying to make is that I'm not going to let my kids grow up being soft bums. They'll get help from me only after they've tried as hard as they can. I'm not fond of quitters, not even my own sons.
Kate, who the hell are you? What's your problem with me? Are you sleeping with Mr. Cereal Bowl or something?
That said, I don't hate you, little people. I don't like you either.
Have a good day.
Posted by: Elite Scum | January 16, 2008 at 01:28 PM
Scummy,
You said:
"Look, I make in a week what most of you make in one year. That without even counting the bonuses. Live with it."
You claim that you already have all the money that you would ever need.
If that is true then what the hell are you wasting your valuable time on here? If I made that kind of money I would be on the beach somewhere sipping a very large alcohol beverage.
I believe you are full of shit and the highest employment status you ever attained was an Animal Technician. So go and change some rat shit and make sure all of the cages are clean.
Posted by: To Elite Scum | January 16, 2008 at 02:07 PM
Scum - I've got a suspicion that I already made more money today then you'll make all year. What f'n millionaire (who worked for it as you've claimed- not who inherited it) has the time to post the banal crap you do - and at 1:28 on a Wednesday afternoon at that.
If you're really such hot shit you could have made 10 or 15k in the time it took you to offend all the "little people".
Posted by: cabbie | January 16, 2008 at 02:10 PM
"We already have all the money they will need to live without working all their life. Look, I make in a week what most of you make in one year."
And, yet, if that were true, you're a miserable bastard. My "problem" with you is that you're taking out your deep-seeded anger and insecurities on someone who's done nothing to you.
Posted by: Kate | January 16, 2008 at 02:17 PM
to the person who lived in Somerville all their life, must of lived under a rock!! Everyone that knows Jimmy knows he is a wonderful Dad with 2 well-rounded cultured sons. He's funny,intelligent, and sincer. GET A LIFE!!!
Posted by: carol | January 18, 2008 at 05:58 PM