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March 01, 2007


Mole Fan

I'm sure the Mole can clarify some of these rumors. I am looking foward to a good Friday posting....


A "loach devise"??? Seems fishy. You mean LoJack? Also, it would be a the noun "device," not the verb "devise."

Spell and spell again

Also, the printed version of the MaxPak article (not online yet) several times refers to "tracks and tiles" on the future Community Path right-of-way. That should of course be "tracks and ties".

Cambriville News

"All the News - As We See It"


To: Cambriville News Staff

From: Dr. Mrs. McCarthy
Editor In Chief

Re: Somerville News

I was informed earlier this week that Neil McCabe has left the Somerville News to take a position with Al Gezera TV and has left for the Middle East. He will be covering the war in Iraq for the next 3 years.

It is bad news for us here at CN that Jamie Norton, heir apparant to the Norton fortune, has taken control of the helm at SN. Young Norton now holds the title of General Manager and Editor. Kids, this is not good for us. Young Norton is smart, ruthless and will be a fierce competitor. Although he has been known to have occasional cases of severe flatulance, this has not stopped him in his quest to produce the best local newspaper on the planet.

As of this morning, I will be conducting a full productivity review which may result in cutbacks here at Cambriville News. We will all have to tighten our belts here in anticipation of a new look, aggressive reporting, and enhanced revenue strategy that young Norton is sure to deploy.

In the interim, please remember to properly extinguish all doobies in the ashtrays we recently placed in the employee lounge. The freakin carpet looks like shit.

The staff meeting for this week has been cancelled. I'm leaving for Monserrat in the morning. I need rest.



I hear a little bit of scandal that the Mayor of our mayor's sister city has been removed from office in Italy. Whether he lost or not I don't know but when your out your out right Jack. Maybe the News or the Nose can find out more facts.

The Mole

Dickybird, are you talking about Massimo Magliozzi?

The Mole


Alright, how did the Farm Team get a hold of a copy of "The Cambriville Guide to Style"? I am referring to the unintentionally hilarious article featuring Sen. Jarrett Barrios and Farm Team editor Katherine Powers visiting the Market Basket on Somerville Avenue and discussing "healthy grub on the cheap". The story featured a recipe co-written by a two-year old, a picture of Barrios appearing to lecture a recondite Powers about lowfat ricotta cheese, and the piece de resistance - Powers referring to herself as a "fat slob".

Not only that, there must have been a copy of the upcoming Cambriville News schedule, because the piece appears to have been egregiously lifted from a list of future CN feature articles such as:

- Rep. Carl Sciortino and DPW Commissioner Stan Koty visit Louis, Boston and other Newbury Street businesses to discuss "Couture et L'homme"

- BOA candidate Marty Martinez and Alderman Bob Trane exchanging hair care tips

- former BOA candidate Kevin Tarpley and Somerville businessman Steve Grossman discuss financial planning

- BOA members Rebecca Geewhiz and Bill Roche on a double date to the Lilith Fair and Wrestlemania

and more. I'm sure Dr. Mrs. McCarthy will ferret out the guilty party at the next staff meeting.

That is all.

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy

All Hail the Trickster!!!!!!!!!!

All Hail the Trickster!!!!!!!!!!

Long Live the Trickster!!!!!!!!!!

My Idol!

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy

Ron Newman

that was priceless, Tricky. Keep it up.

At Last

Powers referring to herself as a "fat slob".
The farm team got one right.



It was erroneously reported that a future Cambriville news feature would be about BOA members Rebecca Geewhiz and Bill Roche on a double date to the Lilith Fair and Wrestlemania.

Instead, Geewhiz will spend an entire day with Cambriville News majordomo Jamie Norton. In addition to the Lilith Fair and Wrestlemania, Geewhiz and Norton will also visit Club Passim and the Foxy Lady in Brockton.

The News regrets not identifying the obvious punchline in its earlier edition.

Also, next Tuesday night join hosts Bill White and Dr. Mrs. McCarthy at a randomly selected Dunkin' Donuts in Somerville for another round of "What's in Carberry's now?" Winners will each receive a gift certificate for a free lunch at O'Naturals.

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy

My Dearest Tricky,

Uh, sweetums, O'Natural on Elm went the way of the Someday. Poof! Gone! Don't know if they relocated but the smell of tofu and sprouts on Elm is no more.

Write yourself a check for the past two posts. Lovin it.

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy

Ron Newman

Closed late last year. Now a Boloco. Tofu is still served on request.

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy


For Christ's sake, what's with the colors changing? You could warn us that you're bored this afternoon and doing this. JMJ I thought I was having a freakin stroke.

I like it though. Carry on.

And Butters,

What did I tell you about strolling through Davis Square without your coat on. I know you want to start showing off your newly toned bod, but you'll catch your death of cold. It's not even Saint Paddy's Day you damn fool.(Note to Self: Hitch a ride up to Manchester NH some day this week and pick up the old GStout).

The Ice Lady Melteth,

Dr. Mrs. McCarthy


If that legal mind is a nuckle head what else is new? He is just a fool.

the nose that knows

To all my brothers in the Union. M.B. is dirty & he is selling us all down the drain, for his own benifits. Why are you letting this happen?

William Hurst

Could it also be that a certain city solicitor and a politico to be named later love to go skiing together.

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